January 14th: My mother's funeral.
Jan.
14th, 1986 (Age 7, Evansburg, New Hampshire)
Drug
School
Dear
diary, this is January 14th, as you can see. Jan. is short for this month. We also watched the Brady Bunch today. They have a girl named Jan!
* * * * *
Monday,
January 14th, 1991 (Age 12, Evansburg)
Hi! I just finished watching the movie Indiana
Jones and the Last Crusade. Sonia lent
it to me. It was really good!
I felt sick today. My mom still made me go to school. She never lets me stay home. But she’ll probably let me stay home
tomorrow. Good!
Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday
this week our classes go to D.A.R.E.
* * * * *
Tuesday,
January 14th, 1992 (Age 13, Evansburg)
It poured rain
all day today. I think it might still be raining. Everything was ice this
morning.
I just took a picture of myself. I
see the light of the flash whenever I blink. It looks neon green, outlined in
bright purple.
DREAM #3
Evangeline called
me on the phone and asked me if I could spend the night at her house. I asked
my mom and she said I could. Evangeline told me she had a present for me. When we
hung up I realized it would only be polite for me to get a present for her,
too. So I got packed and my mother drove me to the drug store. There was
one whole wall of coloring books. I got Evangeline three Beauty and the Beast books: a coloring book, a sticker book, and a
paint-with-water book.
* * * * *
Thursday,
January 14th, 1993 (Age 14, Evansburg)
The
day is done, and the darkness
Falls from the wings of night,
As
a feather is wafted downward
From an eagle in his flight.
I
see the lights of the village
Gleam through the rain and the mist,
And
a feeling of sadness comes o’er me,
That
my soul cannot resist:
A
feeling of sadness and longing,
That is not akin to pain,
And
resembles sorrow only
As the mist resembles the rain.
Come,
read to me some poem,
Some simple and heartfelt lay,
That
shall soothe this restless feeling,
And banish the thoughts of day.
Not
from the grand old masters,
Not from the bards sublime,
Whose
distant footsteps echo
Through the corridors of time.
For,
like strains of martial music,
Their mighty thoughts suggest
Life’s
endless toil and endeavor;
And tonight I long for rest.
Read
from some humble poet,
Whose songs gushed from his heart,
As
showers from the clouds of summer,
Or tears from the eyelids start;
Who,
through long days of labor,
And nights devoid of ease,
Still
heard in his soul the music
Of wonderful melodies.
Such
songs have power to quiet
The restless pulse of care,
And
come like the benediction
That follows after prayer.
Then
read from the treasured volume
The poem of thy choice,
And
lend to the rhyme of the poet
The beauty of thy voice.
And
the night shall be filled with music,
And the cares, that infest the day,
Shall
fold their tents, like the Arabs,
And as silently steal away.
--Henry
Wadsworth Longfellow (1807 - 1882)
* * * * *
Friday, January
14th, 1994 (Age 15, Nagasaki, Japan)
I was hoping I’d
get a letter from Evangeline or Sonia’s Christmas present today, but I didn’t. I
did get a card from Sabrina Patel apologizing for not writing in so long. I haven’t
gotten a letter from her since August, and we used to write faithfully each
week.
* * * * *
Saturday, January 14th, 1995 (Age 16, Kobe, Japan)
We had a party at Sei's house. Eight people from my school were there. We had a great time. His mom made lots of food. I didn’t drink much, but I had a whole glass of tequila, so I had quite a buzz. I actually don’t like most of those people very much, but I had a good time trying to bond with them.
Sei and I were only alone together about an hour before they all came. It’s so much fun...how should I say...”fooling around” with him. There are plenty of opportunities for us to go all the way, but I always say no. It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just that I have this feeling deep down that I would probably get pregnant (scary thought). I do want this relationship to last though, so maybe someday....
* * * * *
Sunday, January 14th, 1996 (Age 17, Kobe)
I went to Sei's house and we really didn’t do much. His cousin is visiting. We watched the new version of Jungle Book with Jason Scott Lee, and that’s about it. I was feeling kind of neglected by the end of the day, so I came back to the dorm early. I also have a lot of math homework to do again.
* * * * *
Tuesday, January 14th, 1997 (Age 18, Millborough, New Brunswick)
We buried Mom today in Millborough, next to Granny and Grandad. My dad thought it should be a happy occasion, so we joked around in the hearse and it wasn’t so bad. He and I cried a little during the church service and I finally broke down at the end of the burial. I’m actually crying now. It went pretty fast, but the rest of the day has been dragging on and on. I don’t think my brother cried at all. I didn’t go in to look at her body in the funeral home, but I caught a glimpse of it reflected in the mirror and it wasn’t her at all. She was all waxy and white. They put a weird little smile on her face that made her look more like Granny. Mom never ever smiled halfway like that, only big or, more likely, not at all.
* * * * *
Saturday, January 14th, 1995 (Age 16, Kobe, Japan)
We had a party at Sei's house. Eight people from my school were there. We had a great time. His mom made lots of food. I didn’t drink much, but I had a whole glass of tequila, so I had quite a buzz. I actually don’t like most of those people very much, but I had a good time trying to bond with them.
Sei and I were only alone together about an hour before they all came. It’s so much fun...how should I say...”fooling around” with him. There are plenty of opportunities for us to go all the way, but I always say no. It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just that I have this feeling deep down that I would probably get pregnant (scary thought). I do want this relationship to last though, so maybe someday....
* * * * *
Sunday, January 14th, 1996 (Age 17, Kobe)
I went to Sei's house and we really didn’t do much. His cousin is visiting. We watched the new version of Jungle Book with Jason Scott Lee, and that’s about it. I was feeling kind of neglected by the end of the day, so I came back to the dorm early. I also have a lot of math homework to do again.
* * * * *
Tuesday, January 14th, 1997 (Age 18, Millborough, New Brunswick)
We buried Mom today in Millborough, next to Granny and Grandad. My dad thought it should be a happy occasion, so we joked around in the hearse and it wasn’t so bad. He and I cried a little during the church service and I finally broke down at the end of the burial. I’m actually crying now. It went pretty fast, but the rest of the day has been dragging on and on. I don’t think my brother cried at all. I didn’t go in to look at her body in the funeral home, but I caught a glimpse of it reflected in the mirror and it wasn’t her at all. She was all waxy and white. They put a weird little smile on her face that made her look more like Granny. Mom never ever smiled halfway like that, only big or, more likely, not at all.
I finally had a dream about her last
night. She only came for a second and said: “Now my name is Yukatsuta Haru
(written like this: ゆかつた はる). I
don’t know what it means. I wonder if it has any meaning in Japanese?
The worst part today was when my dad
asked me if I wanted her wedding ring. He wanted to wear it on his little
finger, but it was too small. I won’t take it because I know Mom would want Dad
to keep it near him.
Dad, Allen, Sei and I are staying at Ingrid’s house tonight (she’s some relative of Granny’s). Tomorrow we have to do some stuff at the bank, and my dad’s going to put the deed to the cabin here in my name.
* * * * *
Wednesday, January 14th, 1998 (Age 19, Exton, New Brunswick)
I’ve finished reading Drums of Autumn and now I’ll probably have to wait another two years for the next Diana Gabaldon book. Noooo! I’ve started Sarum by Edward Rutherford and it seems pretty good.
* * * * *
Thursday, January 14th, 1999 (Age 20, Exton)
I got the job at the supermarket! I still don’t know what hours I’ll be working or how much I’ll make, but it’s still so fabulous!
We went to the Wing Shack and first bumped into two guys from my class and the girls from the Japanese party, and then Yuko and her gang. The new Japanese girls are so friendly and closer to my age, so I’m kind of starting to like them better than Yuko's friends who are all three or four years older than me.
* * * * *
Friday, January 14th, 2000 (Age 21, Exton)
After work (they let me off early) I went to Yuko's apartment to hang out with all the Japanese and Hong Kongese students.
* * * * *
Sunday, January 14th, 2001 (Age 22, Kobe)
Both the violin shop and the foreign grocery store were closed, so two of my tasks, namely restringing my violin and buying hair dye, remain unfinished. We took Juno for his shots. Sei's brother and his wife got a new puppy, a little Yorkshire Terrier that they named Koki.
* * * * *
Monday, January 14th, 2002 (Age 23, Kobe)
Today was a holiday. We drove to Rokko Island. I really need to find a new job. I don’t know how long I can wait.
* * * * *
Tuesday, January 14th, 2003 (Age 24, Kobe)
Most of the kids in my class were absent with the flu, so I only had three. Alexa and I were talking, and I think I might be teaching the three-year-olds starting in April, so I might have some of my same kids again. Unfortunately the two smartest ones are moving to the new branch of the school. I don’t know about my three favorites. I hope they stay here.
* * * * *
Wednesday, January 14th, 2004 (Age 25, Kobe)
This week our school topic is “Emergencies.” We’ve been teaching the kids how to call 119 in case of fire. Well, yesterday a boy from my class went home and called it! At least I know he was paying attention! Haha. He didn’t say anything so the operator hung up and rang back to the house. I’ll bet his mother was surprised.
I went to Alexa's apartment after work for dinner and to work some more on her Peace Boat application, and then to the Dub with Sei. He got drunk and was really mean to me last night, something he hadn’t done for a while. He gives me a few good days or weeks and then he reverts back to his old self again.
* * * * *
Friday, January 14th, 2005 (Age 26, Kobe)
I dyed my hair for the first time in two and a half years, but the color didn’t change at all. It just got shinier. I also forgot to mention that I went to my usual salon for a trim on Wednesday.
* * * * *
Saturday, January 14th, 2006 (Age 27, Kobe)
Tonight is a full moon, it’s nine months before my birthday, and it’s two days after my period, so those seem like good circumstances for conceiving! Haven’t done anything about it though and I’m getting ready for bed.
* * * * *
Sunday, January 14th, 2007 (Age 28, Kobe)
When I got home this morning I gave Penn a bath because he smelled like dog slobber. Then I played the piano, violin, and even the clarinet until 2:30, then took a nap. I woke up at 6:00 and walked to the mall, bought a piano book of movie themes, came home, and made a risotto while listening to The Phantom of the Opera. Then when I was heading to bed Kai called on his way home from the Dub and asked if he could stop by, and he spent the night, but I did lay it out on the table for him that as much as I like him, this is leading nowhere.
Disclaimer: This blog is a work of non-fiction. Most personal names (except for those of celebrities) and place names have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals.
Dad, Allen, Sei and I are staying at Ingrid’s house tonight (she’s some relative of Granny’s). Tomorrow we have to do some stuff at the bank, and my dad’s going to put the deed to the cabin here in my name.
* * * * *
Wednesday, January 14th, 1998 (Age 19, Exton, New Brunswick)
I’ve finished reading Drums of Autumn and now I’ll probably have to wait another two years for the next Diana Gabaldon book. Noooo! I’ve started Sarum by Edward Rutherford and it seems pretty good.
* * * * *
Thursday, January 14th, 1999 (Age 20, Exton)
I got the job at the supermarket! I still don’t know what hours I’ll be working or how much I’ll make, but it’s still so fabulous!
We went to the Wing Shack and first bumped into two guys from my class and the girls from the Japanese party, and then Yuko and her gang. The new Japanese girls are so friendly and closer to my age, so I’m kind of starting to like them better than Yuko's friends who are all three or four years older than me.
* * * * *
Friday, January 14th, 2000 (Age 21, Exton)
After work (they let me off early) I went to Yuko's apartment to hang out with all the Japanese and Hong Kongese students.
* * * * *
Sunday, January 14th, 2001 (Age 22, Kobe)
Both the violin shop and the foreign grocery store were closed, so two of my tasks, namely restringing my violin and buying hair dye, remain unfinished. We took Juno for his shots. Sei's brother and his wife got a new puppy, a little Yorkshire Terrier that they named Koki.
* * * * *
Monday, January 14th, 2002 (Age 23, Kobe)
Today was a holiday. We drove to Rokko Island. I really need to find a new job. I don’t know how long I can wait.
* * * * *
Tuesday, January 14th, 2003 (Age 24, Kobe)
Most of the kids in my class were absent with the flu, so I only had three. Alexa and I were talking, and I think I might be teaching the three-year-olds starting in April, so I might have some of my same kids again. Unfortunately the two smartest ones are moving to the new branch of the school. I don’t know about my three favorites. I hope they stay here.
* * * * *
Wednesday, January 14th, 2004 (Age 25, Kobe)
This week our school topic is “Emergencies.” We’ve been teaching the kids how to call 119 in case of fire. Well, yesterday a boy from my class went home and called it! At least I know he was paying attention! Haha. He didn’t say anything so the operator hung up and rang back to the house. I’ll bet his mother was surprised.
I went to Alexa's apartment after work for dinner and to work some more on her Peace Boat application, and then to the Dub with Sei. He got drunk and was really mean to me last night, something he hadn’t done for a while. He gives me a few good days or weeks and then he reverts back to his old self again.
* * * * *
Friday, January 14th, 2005 (Age 26, Kobe)
I dyed my hair for the first time in two and a half years, but the color didn’t change at all. It just got shinier. I also forgot to mention that I went to my usual salon for a trim on Wednesday.
* * * * *
Saturday, January 14th, 2006 (Age 27, Kobe)
Tonight is a full moon, it’s nine months before my birthday, and it’s two days after my period, so those seem like good circumstances for conceiving! Haven’t done anything about it though and I’m getting ready for bed.
* * * * *
Sunday, January 14th, 2007 (Age 28, Kobe)
When I got home this morning I gave Penn a bath because he smelled like dog slobber. Then I played the piano, violin, and even the clarinet until 2:30, then took a nap. I woke up at 6:00 and walked to the mall, bought a piano book of movie themes, came home, and made a risotto while listening to The Phantom of the Opera. Then when I was heading to bed Kai called on his way home from the Dub and asked if he could stop by, and he spent the night, but I did lay it out on the table for him that as much as I like him, this is leading nowhere.
Disclaimer: This blog is a work of non-fiction. Most personal names (except for those of celebrities) and place names have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals.
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